Woe is me

So I guess I'm semi having another pity party. After reading blogs about black women being independent: is it a good thing or a bad thing, I'm wondering if it really is. Some say, as do I, that's it's something that we kind of fell into. Daddy's leaving home, women have had to be mommy and daddy and bring home the bacon. But also, we're so busy getting degrees, being an executive, devoting ourselves to our church and community, that we don't leave room to "take care of a man." Which, okay, I'm cool with that. But then you complain that we're too clingy, too much into you, and we need to have something outside of you to be more well-rounded. So what do you want? Why is it that the good men are being snatched up, hiding, whatever. And the good woman are left, with their career, church, community involvement, etc., and they can't find a good man? What do you want from us?